I workout at the gym often and therefore shower and change there too. This morning goes down in the record books! HILARIOUS and DISGUSTING…
I showered quickly and heard numerous phlegm balls being thrown to the floor (YUCK!). Thank God I was wearing flip flops. As I walked past several naked ladies to the dressing room, I opened up my locker and began to get dressed. A gentle looking woman walked up, smiled and sat down at the other end of my bench in front of her locker. As we were both getting dressed I noticed some strange behavior. First, she was sitting naked on the bench…secondly, she began to lean to the right?!?! As a mom of two young boys & the younger sister of two big brothers, I am well educated on the “lean” and I was spot on! As she leaned to the right – she let one rip…a loud one that vibrated off the bench! I almost got whiplash as I turned in shock…did anyone else hear this? Was anyone else as shocked as me? As I tried to keep my inner ‘school girl laugh’ inside (cause I DO think farts are funny!), I looked again to find her leaning to the left! AGAIN? Seriously?!?! As loud as the first one, a second one followed. The best part of the whole event was that she remained unfazed by all of it! Was I being punked? I laughed quietly, got dressed and quickly left the locker room.
This is where my lesson for today begins. This is not your bathroom! I do not understand the lack of common courtesy that occurs at gyms. I know that gyms try very hard to make the locker room ‘feel like home’ – BUT IT IS NOT! There are a lot of people around you. We use the same benches, the same showers, the same toilets, etc…here are some rules!
- Don’t sit down naked and rub your butt cheeks all over the chair or bench!
- Don’t bend over right in front of me…naked!
- Don’t spray hairspray all over your head while I am standing right next you (the ozone layer and I would thank you if you changed to non-aerosol)
- Don’t ‘hawk up a loogie’ in the shower and let it fly towards my shower stall!
- Don’t pass gas! (hold it, go into a stall or at least say ‘Excuse Me’ & giggle)
I welcome all other suggestions for more rules…send them to me!
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